The problems that I am facing...

During my form 6 life, I could study with ease without much problems. Maybe it's because of stress, some problems in studying emerge when I am in university. These problems have troubled me ever since semester 1 in university. When I study, I sometimes have problems understanding the lecture notes. A single chapter of lecture notes could easily take up to one day for me to finish. Sometimes even two days. These problems occur in virtually every subject, causing me to lag behind others. Far behind. What's worse, when the problems arise, I would have no mood to study further and go to watch dramas, or play computer games. As a result, I lag a lot behind.

My main problem is I think too hard sometimes, perhaps, always. I feel my mind is somehow stuck in an organized state that everything that comes in must be in order. Anything other than that would cause confusion. And there is one thing, my brain seems to lose part of its function already. It can't take in anything easily, or interpret something anymore.

Of course, I have prayed for this. No matter what, I know I must always believe Him to help me. Amen. God, help me in this. You know I have prayed for this and I feel sad over this. Please God, listen to me in my prayer. Amen.

I feel bored. Tired.

After 1 month of holidays, it's time to go back to NTU. For the first time, I am not excited about it. Instead, I feel 'moodless'. I do not understand why. Perhaps it is because I have gotten a bad result in the first semester. Well I guess that's part of the reason. I am heartbroken and depressed, and, unable to control any longer, I wept for a few days. I dont understand why that could happen when I did my preparation before the exams. I know I had not really prepared very well to take on the challenges, but I feel at least I could have done better. Virtually all subjects disappoint me. I must admit that very moment ( when I got to know my result ) was among the worst moments in my life. It seemed everything had gone wrong. Then, one thought appeared to me : maybe it's God's will. Till now, I still dont understand why ( well I am not sure about it ) did He give me such a bad result.

Secondly, somehow I feel this place is 'confining'. Well, I do not have a spacious room, that's why. In addition, I do not have cozy sofa and a nice TV, depriving me of the basics in life. In short, I do not feel homely at this place.

But what can I do? Just accept the truth and carry on with life. And I pray that I can get good result this time. Amen.

Confession of a Sinful Man

Oh Lord, I confess that I am a sinful man. I did many things that are evil to you in many ways. I know you are extremely sad, or probably crying deep in your heart for my foolishness. Lord, please save me from these worldly 'Evils' so that I become a real Christian.

I also well aware that I am bound to this world, which also means I am bound to hell. And this is worsening perhaps day by day. I always struggle, even till now, to break loose from their grips for I don't want to enter that awful place...
Help me Lord, to be a better Christian, not just a mere Christian with a baptism certificate. Appear to me, or let me experience you...Don't ever let loose your mighty hand and let me fall into the abyss. It is the last thing i would wish for.
In the name of Jesus, I pray. Amen.

Prayer of a Man

Oh dear God, I recently found out that in order to enter NUS and NTU, I have to pass a colour blind test. Lord,
help me to pass it, so that I can study in Singapore. Help me as you helped in my driving centre. Do you remember, you helped me to pass the test with just the least score to be considered ' LULUS'? Once again, I beg you to do the same miracle in my color blind tests in both NUS and NTU.
I really hope to pursue my tertiary education in Singapore. May your blessings fall upon me. Hallelujah.

In the name of Jesus, I pray. Amen.

Struggles Within ME

This world is full of greed, hatred, jealousy, lust and et cetera. It is indeed a vice place where people kill, murder, steal...Who can claim that he or she is a perfect human being? The answer is: nobody.

While some people may seem to be 'good' in everything, the fact is, they aren't...at least not in their inner self. We are mere creations of God. Ever since Adam and Eve sinned against the Lord, sins started to conquer. Even though, others may not have realized, we know that we sin every now and then deep in our heart. It's just FREQUENCY of committing them that separate us.

However, Christians's faith in God has managed to do quite a good job in curbing them from sinning. We know one day He will come to judge us, be it christians or non-christians. But in the meantime, there are those who are struggling to become a convinced christian. That means, they sometimes do sin but soon after that, they ask for forgiveness and repent.

Honestly speaking, I am one of those.

Luckily, my faith still saves me from indulging deeper and deeper in worldly things, or worldly affairs...at least till now.

To sin or not to sin, it's up to us. But heed my words, we will one day be judged. There is simply no escaping it. 

Should or Shouldnt

As I have mentioned bfore, as time goes by, my desire to study in Singapore has grown tremendously over the months. From an anything-also-can person to an only-want-this person, i realized I have changed. A few days ago, perhaps a few weeks ago, I faced a dilemma that emerged from IJM scholarship. It would have been a good news to me...but...dunno...because in my heart I did ( a little bit ) fear that my parents would pressure me into accepting the scholarship's offer ( that's if I dont get the   singapore scholarship in the first place ). I started to figure out a solution to this. I was previously moved by the idea of failing it deliberately but I soon changed my mind. That's because it was far more important to get it to show that I am capable of winning one. So, it is ULTIMATELY important to prove my parents! However, despite all these, I still believe He will provide What I am truly after.

Failure is The beginning of AnoTher sucCEsS

On 10th may, I stepped into the room to secure a place in ASEAN, Nanyang, and College scholarships...
Within one week, I was informed that I was rejected by them...

That was a blow to me, due to a sudden loss of three chances...

However, I am not saddened by this anymore, as I know when He closes one, He opens another. I keep on telling myself that I must have faith, always. One day, I heard a click in my head and I realized I have been stressing on getting into NUS in my prayers. That is due to its ranking than NTU. I think He must have realized this, that's why the chances slipped away from my hands. Guys, you are obliged to pray for me after you have read this. Thanks.

It's A 50-50!!!

To my delight, I was shortlisted for the scholarships' interview ( NTU one ). I was very happy, if not extremely happy, because as time goes by, my desire to study abroad has increased a HUNDREDFOLD! Now, I ll be truly disappointed if I dun get into any of the universities in Singapore.
So, my interview was carried out at Ritz-Carlton Hotel. It was rather difficult for me because the questions that were fiReD at me really had me speechless a couple of times. In the end it seemed as though I was unsure about my chosen path. Of course, this is ultimately important because the scholarship providers want somebody who is certain, not those who will regret their choices later. However, the whole interview was interactive, and...humorous as well. Candidly, I do prefer NUS compared to NTU. But who knows what I might be getting so every opportunity is ULTIMATELY IMPORTANT. I wouldnt say it was a huge success but I certainly think GOD is doing HIS job. It seems as thought it is a 50-50 chance, but if we pray hard, the chances are definitely more than that, if not 100%!!!

MY EnDLeSS TrouBLeee...

After i got my STPM result, i started to search for scholarships, be it the local ones or the overseas ones. I have found many and I applied them. But bfore that, I had to apply the relevant universities first. So, I applied NTU and NUS both. Both gave me troubles...When I was applying NUS, I accidentally put 1992 in my date of birth. A terrible mistake. For a few days I was overwhelmed by fear. I quickly emailed the people to change for me. Meanwhile, I also made a huge mistake in the application of NTU. You know what? I uploaded the uncertified copy of my MUET result.

Arghhh......Similarly, I emailed the person-in-charge to remove the one that I had uploaded so I could upload another one. These seemingly minor mistakes could cost me dearly...After accomplishing these, I quickly applied the scholarhips. Everything went out smoothly except one- Singapore Scholarship. On the website it said the form had to be endorsed by JPA or High SChool. I sent it to JPA and I was informed later that JPA didnt process that. Thanks for the tip from my uncle, I rushed to make a new one to be sent to High School. Subsequently, I posted it to the address stated. It was not until the last few days when I realized I have to make another 3 copies.........GOD BLESS ME!!!! 

OneRepublic - Say (All I Need)

Do you know where your heart is?
Do you think you can find it?
Or did you trade it for something
Somewhere better just to have it?
Do you know where your love is?
Do you think that you lost it?
You felt it so strong, but
Nothing's turned out how you wanted

Well, bless my soul
You're a lonely soul
Cause you won't let go
Of anything you hold

Well, all I need
Is the air I breathe
And a place to rest
My head

Do you know what your fate is?
And are you trying to shake it?
You're doing your best and
Your best look
You're praying that you make it

Well, bless my soul
You're a lonely soul
Cause you won't let go
Of anything you hold

Well, all I need
Is the air I breathe
And a place to rest
My head

I said all I need
Is the air I breathe
And a place to rest
My head

Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Better than you had it
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Yeah, better than you had it (Better than you had it)

I said I all I need
Is the air I breathe
And a place to rest
My head

I said all I need
Is the air I breathe
And a place to rest
My head

Do you know where the end is
Do you think you can see it?
Well, until you get there
Go on, go ahead and scream it
Just say it

More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/o/one_republic/#share

My part-time job as a Beer Promoter

Haiz...in no time, i am jobless again..unemployed. i really miss those happy moments in Giant(i worked for GAB)...Four GAB promoters, two Carlsberg promoters, Revive promoters, Yeo's and F&N's...we have had so much fun..oh yeah,thanks to the fortresses made of beer cartons, we were able to eat snake(makan ular) safely, surrounded by 'impenetrable' walls. Even other promoters came a long way juz to eat snake...plus, our beers were sold at a corner, safely hidden from any CCTV(as if Giant got a lot..>.<)...and you know what, we could play 'police and killer' for many hours, that was if nobody was around...definitely not in front of a supervisor...for instance,Jeffrey. Ohh,i juz miss those moments...Thanks to u guys...muackzzz!

What a specIaL CNY i have had!

I went back to hometown on the eve,and i found myself facing a 'catastrophe'-flood. It had been raining for a few days, quite heavily in Melaka,Johor and Negeri Sembilan..I saw water everywhere..inside the drains,on the roads, and was flooding every place it could. As if it wasn't bad enough, i heard people said the water level could continue to climb, and tat's when i started to panic..or fear..because the water might cut off routes back to Melaka...Fortunately, on the day we took off, the water level dropped slightly and i was able to visit my fellow friends..>.<...

F6 Trip tooo Perak

Hallelujah, i was back safely,so did the others. First day,we went to Gua Tempurung..well,i went there bfore but this we did something more extraordinary.3 hours one...we climbed the stairs,up and up, and reached top of the world...it's quite high u know...Later,we entered a pit(or hole,up to u)...where the nightmare began...actually,i hv claustrophobia, so i was a bit reluctant to go but there was no alternative...terpaksa go lo...the whole area was pitch black so everyone had to bring a torchlight(but i din)...sometimes you even hv to lie down to cross the place coz the roof was only a few feets high...gotta waatch out.Hey,robin,i believe u hv had a nightmare wif tat...this went on for quite long lah..then,we got ourselves cleaned and took off to Pulau Pangkor by ferry. We snapped some photos..and enjoyed the scenery.In pulau pangkor leh,we did many things...we cycled to explore the island,barbequed(not really),digging for the blue stuffs(ask Vincent)...let's hold on for a while and start imagining............
Done?kkk...we oso swimmed and snorkelled..syok man...snorkelling..it was the coolest activity to me but i din really see much lah due to my ss(short-sightedness)...plus the water was a bit murky...and the banana boat. we sat on something looked like a banana..and when time comes, it would 'capsized' and we would fall into the sea...got one batch they fell 3 times,once in the middle of the sea...
Next day, we went to an sun ta then to kl. we went to sungei wang,times square and pavilion...it was gorgeous...in conclusion, the whole trip was a great FuN,unforgettable,amazing. It would be much much better if u guys come along...nice...bye

Avril Lavigne - When You're Gone

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too

When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through
The day and make it ok
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
[ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/a/avril-lavigne-lyrics/when-you_re-gone-lyrics.html ]
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
And when you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too

And when you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through
The day and make it ok
I miss you

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah

And all I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
And when you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too

And when you're gone
All the words I need to hear will always get me through
The day and make it ok
I miss you

My feelings towards the end of F6 life

End of F6 life...it started when the outing ended...i started this blog when i entered f6,and now,in no time,1and a half years had passed so silently...to be frank,i truly enjoyed this period,thanks to fellow friends...well, i really miss almost every bit of happy moments...celebrating birthdays,alubaing people,visiting teachers' houses,and so on...on..and on....we studied under one roof,we made jokes,laughed...but for me,upper six life is more unforgettable because in lower six,we barely knew each other...you guys are awesome...i had an insomnia on the night when we went to karaoke...keep recalling happy moments...so afraid tat they might fade away....haiz..time flies man..it flies..you see..one moment it was there,and now it's nowhere to be seen. So,appreciate every moment...watever it is,dun linger too much on these memories,instead,keep going on,keep striving hard to achieve our goals in life. Goodbye,my fellow friends...we ll meet again someday. IT"S TIME FOR MIRACLES!

A TruLY MemoRabLe EXperIence for Them....

Recently, i read the news bt the retreat of US soldiers from Iraq. It had been an extremely hard journey for the fellow soldiers..They lived in fear daily, afraid of the next suicide bomb attack from rebellious forces. It muz be a great relief.. In 2003 (George Bush was the president), America sent troops of soldiers to Baghdad in the name of peace. The government accused Iraq of possessing large-scale powerful weapons as well as conspiring with terrorists. And so, this was how Iraq War began....

After months of fruitless search, America admitted they had no proof that supported their accusations. In Dec, they toppled Saddam Hussein anyway...The people, also toppled him, at least his statue, when the tyranny ended. In 2004, he was executed..

George Bush was greatly condemned by the Americans and of course, UN. One Iraqi reporter threw a shoe at him but missed..he was then hailed as a hero in his motherland. To overcome further dissatisfaction among Americans, Barack Obama, who beated McCain and Hillary Clinton, stated formally that troops would retreat by 2010 (was this his propaganda?)...
In conclusion, Iraq War was a complete failure coz Iraq is still troubled by terrorists...when will this end??

HERE COMES THE FLASH MOB!!!

FlaSh MoB refers to a group of people(they can be strangers too), who perform an act in unison at anywhere and anytime...For example, they clap their hands suddenly on a busy street. The photo below is an example...

                          An iPod flash mob took over London's Victoria Station on Friday

                                                                            Zombies


It can be meaningless or meaningful( to tease a particular group of people ). Whichever it is, these acts are meant to draw attention from passers-by..Talking bt its history, this seemingly lame culture originates from America(perhaps the craziest country in the world), then spreads quickly across the globe...It was started in 2003 by Bill Wasik..

                                               Pillow fight....dun wan giv me ma...
Usually, it would be better if the mobs freeze  before they act...After they hv finished the act, they will disperse as if nothing has happened..COOL!


More images...

                                                   Kissing in Moscow...so romantic...

                        Flash mob is a large group who assemble suddenly.....is there an UFO?

COld WAR...

The Cold War (Russian: Холо́дная война́, Kholodnaya voyna, 1947–1991) was the continuing state of political conflict, military tension, proxy wars, and economic competition existing after World War II (1939–1945), primarily between the Soviet Union and its satellite states, and the powers of the Western world, particularly the United States. Although the primary participants' military forces never officially clashed directly, they expressed the conflict through military coalitions, strategic conventional force deployments, extensive aid to states deemed vulnerable, proxy wars, espionage, propaganda, a nuclear arms race, and economic and technological competitions, such as the Space Race.
This is an extract from Wikipedia...cold war, between Russia and US has lasted for decades. Spies are secretly creeping into the enemy's country under the cover the darkness. Their missions are, undoubtedly, to steal highly secured information, ranging from weapon technologies to military's weaknesses...Recently, the newspaper reported that US and Russia had a deal. US got back 4 spies and Russia got back 10. It seemed obvious, according to the press, that Russia was the clear winner...but, mathematics isn't everything....The press stated that those US spies were those who possessed top secrets..while the Russian spies were less 'important'. When the exchange was over, vice president of US, Joe Biden, was interviewed and asked about

                                                                          Joe Biden

this lousy bargain in a TV show. He laughed and said he wasn't the one who were in charge of all this....anyway, i do believe that it was a win-win situation...oh yeah..do u know how the exchange was done? let me tell u. The airplanes carrying spies belonged to US and Russia took flight to another  country. They met at an airport. Then, they got very close to each other so that no one could see the process. After it was over, the planes flew back to their own countries....spies are indeed everywhere...are u one of them??